Day 10

     Our usual Fridays consist of ordering or making pizza and watching a movie with the kids. Tonight we decided to shake things up and take the family out to dinner. Clearly we needed to get out of the house, because even though that is one of the most stress inducing things you can do with two small children, it sounded like a fantastic idea. We drove into town and picked the place closest to our parking spot...

I'm pretty sure I'm sleeping while standing and holding a baby

     We walked into the restaurant and requested to sit in a section where the noise from the kids would be least offensive. Little did I know that Ben would choose tonight to learn how to shriek like a banshee. I could feel the condescending gaze from the people around us as we tried to shove food in his mouth, bounce, sing and "shhhh" him into a calmer state. I should also mention it was 7:30, the time that most competent parents put their kids to bed, not take them out to dinner. Thankfully Lucas was the most well behaved he has ever been. 

     In the midst of Ben's screaming, my husband and I started to meltdown. I thought we must be the worst parents for taking our kids out to eat at a pub so late at night. We briefly contemplated canceling our order and making a quick exit, but we rallied and made it through the meal- it helped that the waiter brought us our beers quickly (and upgraded mine to a 16oz). There was a lot of one handed eating and I don't quite remember what I ordered/ate, but we did it. In the end the meal cost $60 as opposed to a $20 pizza, but we both agreed that it was worth the $40 dollars to rise to the occasion and have a sense of accomplishment! 

     This was a huge parental self-esteem boost during a time I think we needed it. We calmed Ben, Lucas used his manners (and didn't have a potty accident) and everyone ate their meal. Is it me, or do Friday nights take on a whole new meaning as we age? I remember when my husband and I would rush home after work and catch a train into the city or drive out to visit with friends. We'd dress up, go out and then do it all again on Saturday night! 

     Tonight my husband asked me if this is what I signed up for when we decided to have children. It's 11pm and he is sleeping on the couch, the kids are in bed and I'm ready to join them. Instead of having a leisurely dinner and drinks at the bar, we pretty much swallowed our food whole, ran to the car and I'm now drinking herbal tea that supports my milk production. 

     Yes, this is what I signed up for. This is what I want. It is a beautiful, albeit exhausting, life and I'm thrilled to share it with him.