Day 11

   When I workout at the gym or run a race, I always envision myself as a bad ass athlete. I imagine I look strong, lean and graceful. Then I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror or a photograph and come back to reality.

Pilates is fun...and slightly awkward looking.  

     This isn't to say I'm not proud of this photograph or the strength I'm displaying. It's just a reality check that physical fitness is hard work and I shouldn't expect to look like a photoshopped model in a fitness magazine mid squat. I'm not working out to look attractive. I'm working out to be strong and healthy.
     After two traumatic pregnancies/births via c-section, my abdomen was in rough shape. I had something called diastasis recti (beware- the image on wikipedia is of a infant and may look painful) and was having a difficult time with the postpartum recovery process. I happened upon the Reformer Pilates class at my gym and after 8 sessions, my muscles have returned to their proper location. My instructor, Nellie, has been a huge help in my quest for strength and I've signed up for another 8 sessions.

     I chose this photo because it depictes a huge improvement for me. Eight weeks ago I did not have the abdominal strength to elevate my hips/lower half like that. Yes, I'm still carrying some padding around the middle, but I can feel the strong foundation I'm building. I've stopped focusing on "getting back in shape". I'm in the shape I'm supposed to be in as a nursing mother, recovering from a major surgery. I'm trying my best to live well in this body and enjoy the beauty of it at every phase of life.